Be Happy Anytime?

“I understand life has waves of positivity and negativity, in fact, it is probably unhealthy to only experience happiness. So how can we cultivate a happier life? More-so, everything to be happy is here. How can we learn to appreciate smaller things such as being on the bus or waiting line for a fast food place or being in a situation where nothing goes your way. To sum it up: How can you be happy at any time.” – Zenmaster6

Seems to me like you’re not clear with where happiness actually comes from…and what its absence really means. Let’s straighten that out right away:

Happiness is what you feel when you’ve picked up a lot of momentum around being focused on what you like.

Meaning that if you’re in a situation where you haven’t already been focused on what you like for a long time, then, AT FIRST, you’re not going to experience happiness. At first, you might be starting at anywhere from as high as boredom or frustration or as low as disgust or rage.

Yeah, you actually look like that!

At those points, your job is not to get yourself to happy. Your job is to just feel one level better. And I don’t mean ‘calmer‘ by the way. I think a lot of people stagnate their own progress because they think that appearing calm on the surface is better than expressing the upsetness they feel inside. It’s not.

Emotions are not a fake it ’till you make it sort of game.

Emotions are a game of rewiring your brainone moment at a timeso that your wiring is more optimized for being constructive and appreciative rather being optimized for being destructive and ungrateful.

What’s key is that WHEREVER you find yourself— be it on the bus, or waiting in line at a fast food store—you need to feel yourself however it is your feeling. Even if it’s a subtle feeling. Like, slight boredom. Or slightly intrigued for what’s coming. Whatever that feeling might be because that feeling is going to be your starting ground.

NEXT, I recommend you ask yourself one of these two questions:

  1. What do I like about now?
  2. What can I do to like now a little more?

Question #gets you focused on what’s present that you already like. Question #gets you to actually do something that’ll make what’s present more likable for you. Both are necessary for a great life.

Now, it’s worth mentioning that there IS value in feeling bad.

Feeling bad lets you know that you’re focused in a way that you don’t like, and it’s there to signal you to change course. It’s NOT there for you to put up with it, as a LOT of people do.  It’s there for you to take it seriously, listen to it, and constructively work with it. If you don’t dismiss them and instead, actually investigate them with a kind of genuine curiosity, your darkest emotions will lead you to your brightest discoveries.

Buckminster Fuller would not have become who he was if his bad feelings didn’t guide him.

Buckminster Fuller, the brilliant thinker who coined the word ‘synergy‘ and invented the geodesic dome, almost took his own life so his wife could cash in on the life insurance. He was in his early 30s and had just become a dad, and no matter how hard he tried, he could not provide for his family. In his feeling of being complete and utter failure in life, he was about to kill himself when he had a life-changing idea that led to him not only providing for his family but also allowed him and his family to thrive, while he was doing what he was most naturally pulled by. You can read about that idea in the well-written article here.

Just gives me goosebumps thinking about it.

The reason why I share his story here is that no one ever thinks that exploring your suicidal thoughts and feelings will lead you to a life-transformative idea, but that’s exactly where those life transformative ideas like to hide. But you’ll only ever discover the gold at the end of those caves by going in with a non-judgemental attitude that is genuinely curious and just wants good things to happen to people. When you go in with that attitude, you’ll discover treasure.

Enlightenment or Drugs?

“I’m 19 years old and I’ve learned a lot about fulfillment, self-awareness, and happiness. I’ve learned that no material thing can give me lasting happiness or fulfillment. The good feelings that drugs, sex, and other distractions bring dissipate quickly and keep me from being fully enlightened. Now, I’m a very curious guy, and I’m craving for new experiences, like traveling, drugs, and intimacy. I’m confused, will new experiences keep me from enlightenment or help me with it?”

Looks to me like you’re confused because you have an unclear idea as to what enlightenment actually is. So, let’s clear that up right now:

Enlightenment is the state of when you’re tuned into what’s most important to you.

The reason why the traditional image of someone who’s striving to achieve enlightenment is someone dressed like a monk, sitting underneath a tree, and just meditating with their eyes closed is that the hardest part about achieving enlightenment is stopping your habit of focusing on things that you don’t actually give a shit about.

He’s probably on drugs 😀 LOL

People cut out all sorts of exciting stimuli that the material world has to offer because they’re trying to minimize what they’re involved with so that what they really care for can more clearly shine and that they can more thoroughly and deeply engage themselves with that.

It’s half the reason why for all of 2018, I’ve decided to completely cut all refined sugars out of my diet. Because I know how refined sugars give my brain a chemical high, and as a result, disengage me from actually trying to pursue what I really care for in life which would, in turn, give me a sustainable and self-nurturing high.

Read article here: http://bit.ly/2CpQpcX

Same goes for hanging out with people who are determined to be miserable. Like them, love them even, but love them from a distance. You need to work for caring for who and what you allow into your space. Be that your literal physical environment at home and work or your body’s internal environment in the form of your biochemistry.

You need to make the game as easy for yourself to win as possible.

That’s why the athletes who win in the Olympics shape every second of their life in a way that helps them win. They don’t just get off the couch one Sunday and decide to show up to compete. They train ceaselessly for many years. And you need to treat Enlightenment the very same way.

If you want to get a glimpse into how an Olympian thinks, check out this interview with Nastia Liukin!

So, if certain drugs help you get into the state of being in-tune of what’s important to you, you need to do them. But if they don’t, and they actually are distractions from what’s actually important to you, you need to not do them. If traveling, or intimacy with select individuals are what’s important to YOU or they help you focus in on what’s important to you, you need to do them. If not, what are you doing?

There is no one external path to achieving an internal result.

Everyone’s wired differently and is in different places in their life. So, you can’t ever look to anyone, no matter how similar they might be to you— THAT INCLUDES WHO USED TO BE IN THE PAST— to judge what you should or should not do. That’s a decision that you can only make for yourself, based on what’s important to you, right here, right now.